6 Parenting Tips
Because you are not alone.
Children shall be one of the greatest gifts and blessings any parent shall have but also the greatest test. But the greater the struggle, the greater the reward. Here are six tips to help you along the way but these are by no means how you must parent your child nor do they encompass all elements of parenting; how you raise your child is up to you to decide.
- Never Shout Angrily- Raising your voice so loud that the neighbours can hear benefits no one and creates a broken ground for your child to communicate with you. Sometimes, in the heat of the moment, you may resort to shouting but avoid it at all costs. Speak gently and see the difference as to how your child reacts. After all, children will make mistakes and so will you but work together to better yourselves. And if they do misbehave, use a stern voice and even speak quieter than usual.
- Crouch To Their Level- When you and your child are having a conversation with one another, don’t tower over them, sit at their level. It makes it more meaningful and allows your child to know you are listening and caring. Also, save yourself the neck ache.
- Be Affectionate In Front Of Your Child- Offering love to your child is a given; no child ought to be neglected of it but to further this, be affectionate to others when your child is looking too. A child rejoices when seeing their parents sharing affection- to a certain degree, of course- and by doing this, it promotes love and care in the house and your child with mirror your actions and therefore will be a more loving person. Switch this around and do not be aggressive or angry in front of your child either.
- Hug The Longest- The times you will share hugs will make up countless memories and are beneficial for many reasons. When hugging your child, let them be the one to let go first, sometimes all we need is a good hug and studies show a true hug lasts several seconds, so enjoy the moment.
- Make Them Fear God, Not You- When you make your child fear you, not only does it result in poor child-parent relations but means that once you are not present in their life, even temporarily, they may lead lives that are not righteous because the parent/parents they fear are no longer watching: they have nothing to worry about. What you do is ensure they respect you, so they will never wish to disappoint you and you raise them to fear God, while also loving God. Because no matter what, God always sees and this leads people to live righteous lives, as they wish to please their creator. While some parents may not believe in God or wish to bring their child up in this way, children- untainted by society and innocent- are born with an innate disposition, resulting in their belief in God. (Again this is up to you whether you chose to raise them in this way or not.)
- Never Force- Forcing a child to do something likely will result in them loathing the act and rebelling. You want your child to do things of their own volition because that’s when they have ardour and a desire to do it, resulting in better performance. Forcing them will most likely backfire and won’t be sustaining for long-time habits you wish to implement into their life. Explain the benefits as best you can and do them yourself, if possible, to set an example as you are their role model and when a parent is not the role model their child desires, they look for ones that are. And these usually are not the sort of people you want your child to look up to.
Remember patience, love, knowledge and care will go a long way.
وَٱخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ ٱلذُّلِّ مِنَ ٱلرَّحْمَةِ وَقُل رَّبِّ ٱرْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِى صَغِيرًۭا
‘And be humble with them out of mercy, and pray, “My Lord! Be merciful to them as they raised me when I was young.”’ ~ The Qur’an 17:24
إِنَّمَآ أَمْوَٰلُكُمْ وَأَوْلَـٰدُكُمْ فِتْنَةٌۭ ۚ وَٱللَّهُ عِندَهُۥٓ أَجْرٌ عَظِيمٌۭ
‘Your wealth and children are only a test, but Allah ˹alone˺ has a great reward.’ ~ The Qur’an 64:15
Part two can be found here:
To all the parents who see parenting as a blessing, thank you! And thank you for all the support and inspiration I have been blessed with from so many individuals, including but not limited to:
My parents and loved ones
Dovey ♡
Beau
